Your waiter or waitress has a story to tell

“A man who goes into a restaurant and blatantly disrespects the servers shows a strong discontent with his own being. Deep down he knows that restaurant service is the closest thing he will ever experience to being served like a king.”

Criss Jami

The people in Manet's wonderful portraits, like this one of a waitress, certainly have stories to tell. The painting is so great that you can almost make up a story just from the expression on her face. Well you could if you had more imagination than me. To me she looks a bit distracted perhaps, but that's as far as I can go.

I'm talking about waitresses because here we are in Port Douglas, living like a king and queen being waited on hand and foot, well when we choose. At this hotel you can opt out of having your room done over in exchange for a discount in the restaurants which seems like a good idea. Saves on some of the unecological things like changing towels, though I don't really know that they do. I think they do it every four days. And you can't do the no housekeeping thing for more than three days in a row.

But I digress a bit. What I really wanted to talk about was waitresses - and waiters, though we haven't encountered any of them as yet. The staff here at this five star hotel are very multicultural. Mostly, it seems to me, young people here on working holiday visas. There are some locals of course, but lots of overseas workers. You sort of expect that in Dubai, but maybe not so much here. Don't the locals want to work in hotels? So far we have met Spanish - well Catalan, French, Argentinian, Welsh and Indonesian. The assistant manager is French too. I gather there are lots of other nationalities as well. We are here in the post school holiday period and I think things are a little quieter which meant that there were not many people in the restaurant last night and so the waitresses were able to talk to us more than usual I think.

This is our Argentinian waitress last night - not a good picture I know. If we get a chance we'll take a better one. She came to Australia on her own, but met an Argentian boy whilst here and now she is travelling with him. They are off to WA before too long. She comes from a small town on the outskirts of Buenos Aires. I guess it's fairly skimpy information but not bad for a five minute talk.

We talk to waiters and waitresses wherever we go - well unless they are unfriendly - which is rare, because it's their job to be nice. You should too. You hear a lot of stories and even learn a few things. Sometimes you get a whole potted life story. I remember one Italian waiter in a tiny village in Tuscany who came from Naples, had been to New York, worked there for a while and now was back in this tiny village in a small café which he owned I think. He elaborated rather more on this bare bones, but I can't remember the details. And the other Italian somewhere else who had a Japanese wife. I can't quite remember all the details but you get the picture. It makes the evening or day so much more interesting and enjoyable - and you tend to get better service too. I'm always astonished at how much they are willing to engage with you. Surely you would think they would get bored of this after a time. But maybe not. Maybe most people are rude, or at the very least unfriendly.

priscilla 2

priscilla

The photos above are of Priscilla - more than just a waitress in this particular instance - she is the wife of the chef, front of house, and part owner of the hotel/restaurant that they run in a beautiful but tiny little village - Aragon - near Carcassonne in France. We went to their restaurant La Bergerie to celebrate our friends' 50th wedding anniversary and it was so good we went back for our last night's meal. I suppose we did not learn a lot about Priscilla and her husband - other than that he used to have a Michelin star (well deserved in my opinion) and now doesn't but she muttered that they were better off without it. She was very informative about the wines of the region and a real pleasure to talk to. And efficient as well. And the food was to die for.

Then there was this guy, whose name I can't remember I'm afraid. He is a waiter in the little town of St Antonin Noble Val where we stayed with Australian friends who have bought a little house there. They, however, know him well.

I have taken other pictures of other waiters in other towns, but they are not on this computer I'm afraid.

There is a huge difference of course, between a waiter like this, who actually knew his stuff and who may even be part of the family who owns the café, but could not be more casually dressed, through our tidily dressed in semi uniform waitresses here, to the black tie waiters in posh restaurants. Although I must say that I have noticed that these days even the waiters in posh restaurants are not in true waiter attire like the two in this painting below - but are just dressed in what might be called a 'smart casual' manner.

The tablecloth sort of apron is a bit of a gimmick these days isn't it? And mostly in French restaurants.

I suppose the waitresses we have encountered here are not true professionals. And I suspect that most waiters and waitresses these days are not. The only ones who could be truly said to be professionals are the ones who either own or part own the business (like Priscilla), or who hope to become a maître d' in a posh hotel or restaurant. What does matter is that they should be friendly, well informed about the food and the wine or willing to find out if not, friendly and polite. And I suspect these days that part of the training would be in taking photos on mobile phones.

It's one of those jobs that young people travelling the world do, and one that apparently aspiring actors do. When I was looking for quotes I found lots from famous actors talking about how they started out as waiters or waitresses. By it's very nature it tends to be a casual job, and so there are always vacancies to be found. And I imagine that once you have a bit of experience in the trade you would find no difficulty at all in getting a job. The receptionist at this hotel said that she had been able to get a year extension to her holiday visa simply by coming to the far north. Tourist destinations need staff, and if most of that staff is from overseas on one-year visas, then there must be a constant turnover of staff.

Our French waitress last night was delighted to find that we spoke French and spent some time with us chatting about this and that, including the French government. David was delighted to practise his French and chat with lovely young girls, and it made the whole experience just so much more memorable.

So next time you are in a restaurant. Take their photo as well when they take yours, and ask them about their lives and why they are there. If they're not too busy that is.