The evolution of my family Christmas
Here I am, probably on Christmas day - in the back row, pulling a face, with my mum next to me and grandma in front. Dad is in the front row with my brother and sister and the other guy is my uncle Leslie. There are paperchains hanging on the wall and funny Christmas hats, no doubt from crackers on our heads. We used to make our own Christmas decorations in those days - we made yards and yards of paper chains. Whatever happened to them? And we are wearing winter clothes.
Switch to Melbourne 2017 - I don't really have any photos of this year - and here are the grandchildren - still pulling faces, and this time two of them have Santa hats on, with our sort of Christmas tree and a pile of presents behind them, with one of the dads about to go and start handing them out. And we are in much flimsier clothes as this is summer, although there seems to be quite a variation in how hot or cold the individuals in the picture feel.
Between these two - a time gap of around 60 years some things have remained the same and others have stayed exactly the same.
I suppose the biggest and most obvious change is the summer/winter thing. Same date, completely opposite weather.
When I came to Australia I realised that Christmas and therefore Christianity, was basically a northern hemisphere religious festival. Ditto for Easter. And not only Christianity, for most of the Christian festivals are really based on much older pagan festivals. Pagan festivals for a northern hemisphere climate. The birth of Jesus being a symbol of the year turning from dark to light - new hope. And it just does not fit here in Australia.
The clothes don't fit - I always feel so sorry for all those santas here. They must be absolutely baking, unless they are in an air-conditioned shopping centre. The season doesn't fit - it's the summer solstice not the winter one and we are not moving to the light, but turning towards the dark - and the hottest part of the year which holds the threat of death by bushfire or drowning. We have already had several beach drownings. And the food doesn't fit either.
With respect to the food I changed our own personal Christmas traditions when the children were little and, after a longish day visiting friends I was overwhelmed by having to come back home and cook the turkey. So I changed it to Christmas Eve, which means we have cold turkey for Christmas day, and it is now a Christmas tradition to eat the turkey on Christmas Eve. But we do still have the Christmas turkey - and ham, and roast potatoes and braised cabbage and beans. No Christmas pudding though because nobody in the house likes it, but we do have mince pies. All traditional English Christmas fare. In fact I remember my grandmother putting silver threepenny bits wrapped in greaseproof paper into the Christmas pudding. So exciting if you were the one who found it. And I also remember mixing up the Christmas pudding with my mother ages before Christmas - in November? No shop bought Christmas puddings for us. But here in our household Christmas pudding is a tradition that has died. The shops do have lots of Christmas puddings and Christmas cakes and mince pies for sale, but almost as popular is the dreaded panettone - a tribute to the huge Italian heritage here in the Australian towns. Country too now that I come to think of it. There are certain parts of Australia's bush which are very heavily Italian.
Here we are in Adelaide, which is even hotter than here, having a small family Christmas at home, wearing our silly hats and eating turkey. The boys are still in their pyjamas I see - they went through a phase of wearing pyjamas most of the time. Well they are comfortable I suppose.
And here is a photo of our two grandsons in, what I think, was their very favourite Christmas present - onesies which are a modern kind of pyjama outfit. The younger one was so enamoured of his it was a long time before he took it off. And it was a hot day.
Back in the time of the older photo we were a nuclear family. Sometimes some grandparents came out from England to visit, but mostly it was just the four of us. The turkey must have been smaller at least.
I suspect that the times are a- changing with respect to the Christmas food though. And we may not be keeping up with the trend. You will still find turkey on the menu, but it's often just what they call a buffet roast (no legs or wings), or a boned breast, and it's often served cold. What is creeping in and gradually taking over is a seafood bonanza - even we have instituted a first course of prawns, brought by my daughter-in-law's mum, and gravlax - made by me. Well it's quick and easy and absolutely delicious. Other Australians might barbecue the seafood, and I suspect they also barbecue the ham - well we do too. Not sure when we started that, but it's definitely a family tradition. Here is a picture of the Sheraton Hotel's Christmas lunch here in Melbourne. Yes there are meats, but I think the seafood and the salads predominate and the meat is possibly cold too.
So what other English Christmas traditions do we cling to? The Christmas tree. It used to be a real one, and I still hanker after a real one, but they are very expensive and disappearing - the scouts used to sell them and they possibly still do, but not as obviously, and I don't remember seeing any in the supermarket this year. Nowadays most people go for artificial in one way or another. David being David, designed a minimalist tree - three dowels painted silver and stuck in a triangular base that meets at the top. The glittery stuff is then draped around that and fairy lights too. And they too have evolved. These days we are into LED ones. Gone are the days of the ones you plugged in that always had one that was disconnected and would stop the whole lot turning on. But this year because of the absence of children (very sad in itself), and a bit of gloom about it all, we did not do lights. But we still did the tree, and there were still presents under it. Elsewhere in Oz, and probably because of LED lights, we are becoming more American and festooning the exteriors of houses with lights depicting Christmas scenes. There is one street in Melbourne that has become a tourist attraction for this. And I notice more and more houses around here are doing it too. Not us though.
And I suppose the tradition that will never go away is the present giving, though even here, some virtuous people refuse to have presents or will only give presents of money to a charity. I do admire this - the number of presents is rather obscene in our house - mostly for the children though. Although, they too do not need anything really. But I do think it is nice to give presents. It shows love and an attempt to make somebody pleased, happy even. The number may diminish, but I doubt that this particular tradition will ever go away.
When I was a child our Christmas presents came from Santa, and were left in a pillowcase at the bottom of the bed. What a thrill to wake up in the morning and feel the weight of the full pillowcase on one's feet. At a horrendously early hour too, which was probably the bane of my parents' lives. And I know the same thing happens in my children's households. The parents who arrived here this year were looking tired.
And the sock that had been hung up was now filled with Christmas goodies such as an orange, a chocolate or two and something silly. I think our grandchildren do something similar at home with their parents these days, but we do not of course. Not being believers in Santa. But we now have a big family tradition of a Christmas day lunch - cold turkey and ham, mince pies and other leftovers, washed down with some more bubbly - there's always bubbly at Christmas, accompanied by the grand present giving. Paper everywhere, presents everywhere, lots of noise and laughter, anxiety that what you have chosen for you loved one (a very difficult person in my case) will be appreciated, and a big tidy up job at the end of it all - but many hands make light work. There may even be a few tears here and there as the children accidentally knock something or someone over. But overall - excitement and joy.
Christmas Day itself was a very quiet affair here this year. No children and my sister leaving with her daughter for a week, so just a very few presents to give to them. We held the rest back for Boxing Day when our two grandsons returned from Sydney with their mother. It wasn't the same though - no girls and little Max to join in. They, on the other hand, are having a real Christmas complete with ice and snow in Calgary, Canada. A nuclear family Christmas like we used to have. I do hope that that doesn't become a tradition though.
Over the years some things have become constant - Robert Carrier's turkey with Jane Grigson's celery and lemon stuffing (I think it's the stuffing they really go for), Christmas trees of one kind or another, presents, stress, anxiety resulting in joy and pleasure in family - now an every growing one. Some of those individual elements have changed, and the numbers involved have certainly changed - from two when we first arrived here to almost twenty now. Or I should say from an almost nuclear family back in England to an extended one here.
So just to finish - a selection of pictures I found that showed Australia at Christmas time and some of the things that people do.
Merry Christmas - late I know, but sincere nevertheless
POSTSCRIPT
I forgot to mention another childhood tradition - dates. Because my father worked for the P&O we were treated every Christmas to a basket of fruit and the turkey - a gift from the company, which now I think about it was extraordinarily generous. Did they do it for everyone, or was it really from my dad? I guess I shall never know now.
Anyway included in the basket of goodies there was always a box of dates - I think they were Egyptian. They came in a box, with a picture of camels or palm trees or some such and they were arrayed in the box in two rows - like below.
My apologies for the watermark. Try as I may I could not find a picture of the boxes I remember. Suffice to say that the dates were arranged like this and the boxes had curved ends like this, but they were straight walled and either made from cardboard or very thin wood - I cannot remember. With the lovely picture on the lid. They were just so exotic and a Christmas treat. We never had them at any other time.
